piano. percussion.
2017-09-25 9:35 p.m.

so if i masturbate, it is always to some online porn which maybe is par for the course in this day and age. does anybody masturbate without online porn? its admirable if people do. i think. but i don't or can't or don't bother to try.

and always, after, i either watch a comedy routine HA or listen to some sucky sad music. both of which are perfect displacement activities from, i guess, recognizing that you, er, i am some kind of sexual person who has needs of some sort which is kind of humiliating to profess.

the sad music especially is an odd, uncool afterparty.

but maybe it is like running incessantly all weekend long to atone for all of the horrible things i do every minute when i am not running. i atone for all the food i eat. and all the drinks i drink. and all the thoughts i think.

i dreamt that i found all of these lost dogs roaming and put them in my backyard. at least four. if i could live only with horses or dogs for all eternity, i would pick

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